We all manipulate other people to some extent. But it is completely different when somebody manipulates us.
WeGoRo learned about different kinds of manipulation and how to avoid them.
Flattery is a manipulator’s favorite weapon. If you are such a kind person, how can you refuse to help a poor guy in need? They use this tactic and get what they want from you. Be alert if somebody starts to say nice things to you all of a sudden.
It is so easy to manipulate somebody who feels guilty. They are ready to help with anything. Be careful if you start feeling guilty toward somebody. Their small "favors" are most likely coming.
All good manipulators know that fast emotional decisions are their bread and butter. If they don’t give you enough time to think about something, or if they force you to make a fast decision, they win. A simple phrase like "I need time," if said confidently, will most likely cool the manipulator’s interest down, and he or she won’t ask you again.
You naturally want to help someone who seems to be a poor innocent girl. She is always unlucky and unhappy, and you want to hug her and give her shelter. This is exactly what she wants. Such "victims" can even act like this unconsciously, but it doesn’t make it less of a manipulation.
"You promised me" is a great phrase that will make you do whatever a manipulator tells you, even if you understand something is not right about it. Nobody wants to be the person who doesn’t keep their promises. Nobody wants to look this way. Your answer must always be very clear so that nobody can blackmail you later.
Manipulators love asking for help when you are very busy. This gives them a higher chance that you will agree just to get rid of them. They will apologize a lot, and they will tell you how sorry they are to ask you for help at this moment. Stay alert!
Another favorite move of every manipulator is the phrase "Don’t worry, I (my friend, my boss, a guy I know) have done this many times, and nothing bad happened." It doesn’t matter that the manipulator’s idea scares you. The most important thing is their success. Of course, it’s a lie! Don’t listen to such words. Ask for concrete proof.
Illustrated by Oleg Guta for BrightSide.me